


Are you Satisfied?

by youngbrat



Category: Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms, Fate/stay night: Unlimited Blade Works (Anime 2014)
Genre: Character Study, Characters With Questionable Morals, College/University au but also not, Continuation of ubw London ending, Drug Use, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fate and I shaking hands over curve stomping Shirou's heart, Friends With Benefits, Heartbreak, Jealousy, Leonardo 'Leo' Montgomery - Author's OC, Lucrecia 'Lu' Da Sá - Author's OC, Luvia Edelfelt - Freeform, No Beta Reader We Die Like Lancer, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Rin Tohsaka - Freeform, Shirou Emiya - Freeform, Shirou deserves good thing - but doesn't mean he's gonna get them, Tragic Romance, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, Unsafe Sex, Waver/Lord El-Melloi or whoever that hoe wanna be
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 01:56:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29585496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youngbrat/pseuds/youngbrat
Summary: Shirou knew from the moment he met Lu, he would spend a lifetime loving her. He just didn't know he would spent most of that lifetime missing her, too. Emiya Shirou survived the 5th Holy Grail War, he survived himself, and hell, he even survived his first year of College at the Clock Tower. So why couldn't he survive Lucrecia, too?
Relationships: Emiya Shirou/Original Female Character
Kudos: 6





	Are you Satisfied?

He remembered truly very little about that day. It seemed that every detail of that day paled, bleeding out of his memory until it was no more than a withering mess of murdered 'almost's. For example - Shirou could almost remember what he made for breakfast that morning for both he and Rin. Caffeine tended to sit a tad heavy on one's breath and was a rather hard stench to get rid of once consumed. But even that itself was speculation as it wasn't an uncommon act for Shirou to purchase a cappuccino on his way to morning class. He wasn't much of a coffee-drinker before London, but it seemed that the locals were completely obsessed with the beverage and every variation it could possibly be contained in: Lattes, Chai lattes, Piccolos and Tall blacks, Decaf, Ice coffees...and the list could go on. It was safe to say London had only slightly swayed Shirou's choice of drink as cappuccinos where the only style of coffee he could stomach most mornings. Nonetheless, that did not change the fact that he couldn't truly remember whether he had brewed the drink at home with Rin by his side as they both rushed about to get ready for the day ahead, or if he picked up a cup on his morning rout.

Everything before and after that...encounter seemed to - no, it did dull in her wake. The mere sight of her alone struck his view of the world and left it a dead, lifeless thing. All but void of a soul rich and love heavy.

His concentration, his memory, his focus, his very existence - all of it was but consumed, or rather stolen. Like that of a thief with a jewel, and with night itself. She had stolen him. Wholly and honestly looted him of all his sense and worth.

And with just a look.

Now that he remembered.

To be so thoroughly studied and considered when opening the door to his own home. To be so completely enveloped in someone's gaze... to consume all corners of their regard, no matter how short and insignificant a time, to be the person who fully captured such an intense stare. Such an achingly insatiable stare...

In all honesty, it was rather startling. To the point where it had him fossilised by the doorway and his only form of support came in the form of a single hand wrapped around the doorknob. It kept him stable. It kept him grounded. It also kept the door wide open.

"Emiya. Close the door. You're letting a draft in."

Rin had angled her body towards Shirou to physically show how severely displeased she was with him letting the chill of soon-to-be London's winter in. Like always when they were in front of guests, her voice was much on the more sweeter, feminine side and dismissed any and all trueness of her rather brutish nature. Rin and this other individual were based upon the apartment's only form of flatland. Their kitchen table was a sad and small thing. A simple wooden, round table which, no matter how much he tinkered with it, favoured three legs instead of a whole set. So, it was a bit shaky and uneven, but it still got the job done.

"Oh, right. Sorry."

After the awkward fumbling of words, Shirou entered a hypnotic state. Being a creature of habit, Shirou took comfort in the ability to perform his daily activities without much thought. Almost robotically, he went about closing the door, slipping off his shoes, and meekly breezing his way to the kitchen. He was thoughtless, but mindful of his presence and being soundless as he stepped around the two women on the table. One reason was to not irk Tohsaka any further, but the other was to no longer carry the weight of the stranger's gaze. He needed room to breathe. And to think. If he carried on with his daily tasks and moulded himself into the background, she should find him boring for just a moment, and turn her attention back to Rin or the many books which laid out in front of them.

Ah. So, she must be the student Rin had mentioned taking under her wing and tutoring as a favour for Professor El-Melloi.

Shirou let out a muted sigh. If Rin had been studying or tutoring or whatever for as long as Shirou had hoped for, that would mean she would be peckish and in need of refreshments and maybe a handful of snacks rather soon. Good. That meant he had something to do with himself that could steal his attention away from Rin and her student. Who, now completely ignored Shirou's whole being, had taken to looking incredibly bored and even a touch annoyed, staring off into the distance while Rin rattled on about the basic fundamentals of the Magecraft. That shocked Shirou a little. Lord El-Melloi was not known for letting strays, or rather, individuals who were not protegees in the arts of Magework into his school, let alone under the wing of a prized second year student such as Rin Tohsaka to waste either of their time. This was odd.

His thought process stopped there, however, as Shirou found himself settling into a mesmeric rhythm of preparing a simple fruit platter and a mix of sandwiches. It was a large range of food, he would admit. However, not knowing what this girl did not and did eat was impossible and Shirou would rather not interrupt their session for a second time unless he came baring gifts. He went about fixing a pot of tea next, making note to select Tohsaka's favourite as a silent apology. By the time Shirou was done and the tea and food had been formally placed on a silver tray, he had discovered a handful of things while casually listening in on the two at work.

One, whoever this girl was, and whether or not she was a novice in the World of Magecraft, she was no fool. Nor was she equally thick-headed or intimidated by the topic at hand. Rather, she was completely switched on. So switched on, in fact, some answers Rin had managed to pry from out of her had Shirou confused as to why she was in need of a tutor at all.

His second discovery was an intriguing one. One he also did not know how to properly react to. This strange girl was completely disinterested by whatever Rin had to say and teach about the Mageworld and its intricate mechanics and works. She didn't even try to hide her disenchantment with the topic. Going so far as to noticeably doodle on the textbook in front of her and give a lazed grunt whenever Tohsaka asked if she understood whatever point they had just finished going over.

The third discovery made Shirou especially nervous. Tohsaka had begun to grow tired of her student's lacklustre attitude and blasé half-responses. The skin around her hand had all but started to blush a fine white as the grip on her pen tightened a dangerous amount.

Thus, the following was clearly obvious to Shirou as he made his way to the pair with great caution. While highly intelligent and cognitive, the girl couldn't honestly care about what she was learning and was rather arrogantly displaying her animosity towards being in such a position in the first place. This dismissive and proud attitude, however, was the perfect formula to spark Rin's reactive temper.

Thus, time to defuse the bomb before it blew up in all their faces.

"If you two don't mind me interrupting, I think this would be the perfect time for refreshments." Shirou gave a coy smile as he placed the tray between the two women. "Enjoy."

Thankfully, they both seemed visibly grateful for the minor interruption. Annoyingly, however, Shirou had willingly placed himself in this stranger's line of sight. More now than before did it weigh thickly on him, this look of scrutiny and hyper-fixation. It wasn't a negative gaze, per say. Nor was it an unpleasant one. It just stirred something unknown and equally starved inside of Shirou. It made him feel...airy, to put it simply. If the ginger thought about it hard enough, maybe he could accumulate a proper response to what he felt when her eyes locked onto him. But that was the thing, Shirou couldn't seem to provoke a single conscious thought when he felt the intensity of her stare. But if he found his own set of eyes drifting forwards to wed hers, his mind became similar to that of a beehive. Alive and loud with thought. The catch was all thoughts led Shirou back to how covetous the girl seemed to view the world around her. To be of a personality that cannot help but want and want to such a degree where all sense of fulfilment could not appease this dog-hungry idiosyncrasy…

God, no wonderful the girl was bored out of her mind. She saw no colour in everyday life.

Thus, to be able to hold the attention of such a creature was narcotic. It equally triggered something hungry within Shirou.

"Your help is quite good in the kitchen."

Shirou's head snapped so quickly back to the pair that his ears rung loud that he almost missed Rin's rather ungraceful snort.

"No. Emiya is not my help. He's my roommate and a close friend of mine." Rin announced, and something odd lit the blues of her eyes as she dipped her china cup to take a shallow sip. "Though...He is quite good in the kitchen, I'll admit. He always has been." Tohsaka flickered her eyes over the rim of her teacup and set them on Shirou. It was obvious what she wanted from him, yet subtle and quick enough that the girl - who was and continued to remain nameless. Neither Rin or the girl in question bothered to give such information to Shirou and somehow, that bothered him more than the back-and-forth glances between the two - who was reaching for a second sandwich (Shirou was honestly glad that both girls seemed to enjoy them), didn't seem to catch onto Tohsaka's ploy.

So, Shirou, who honestly could not say 'no' to Rin even if he tried, crept forward. It too was clear to Rin that whoever this girl was, for some reason her jaded nature seemed to dissolve when it came to Shirou.

Fantastic, yet another situation for Rin to use him like a puppet on a string.

"I'm glad you're enjoying the sandwiches. I was worried I was making something you wouldn't like." Shirou leaned against the end of the kitchen bench as he addressed the stranger in his house for the first time. It was a shame they only owned two chairs within their small London flat, Shirou did not get the chance to eat lunch in favour off finishing off a soon-to-be-due paper in the Tower's local library. He too could go for a sandwich or two but refused his stomach due to the lack of vacant seats available and his unwillingness to stand and eat. One, that created a mess of crumbs upon his floor, and two, his traditional Japanese upbringing would not allow him to act so casual and rudely in front of a guest.

However, due to his advantage in height, and the comfortable distance between his person and this nameless girl, Shirou allowed himself the opportunity to repay her in kind for all her intense stares. Given, his own eyes had always had a gentler touch to them, Shirou knew (not that he would ever admit it) on a personal level how heavy his own glance could get.

The girl was quick to match his stare, "no. Your cooking is fine. I especially like the bread. Homemade?"

That airy, yet hungry heat rose back within him.

"Yeah. I made it last night." He swallowed, looking her over once more. "I had leftover flour from the sweets I was making, and I didn't want it to go to waste."

The girl seemed to find amusement in what he said. The ends of her mouth curled up and her eyes drifted to where Tohsaka rested, and to where they stayed for an unnecessary amount of time.

"Ah, so he's not the help. Only your personal chef." Her smile twisted into something more fiendish, “Got it."

For whatever reason, her comment sent Shirou's cheeks aflame. He didn't want to be thought of as just Tohsaka's cook. For whatever reason, it irked Shirou to be dismissed at such a degree by this stranger. For the majority of the time that had passed since he entered his apartment, her serpentine eyes had consumed him and him alone. To no longer be at the very core of one's fixation...it was filthy how unnerved such a thought left him.

How shameless of her, really. To harbour such an obvious and impenitent wanting in her eyes. More so, it was troubling to be an object of this want, in Shirou's opinion. What she wanted from him; he couldn't say. What he could report on, however, was how deliciously addictive it was to be wanted, no matter the sense in which he was wanted in.

"Hey." Shirou spoke, a slight edge to his voice. "I don't just cook."

It wasn't enough, it seemed, to steal her attention away from Rin. However, it was enough to pry a few more words out of her.

"What else do you do then, if not just the cooking? Do tell."

Again, she used that amused, almost impish tone. Dismissing all that was of sense and treating the situation as if it were a game that could be won.

Shirou was at a loss for words. "I... Clean, too. I guess. And sometimes I fix things if they are broken. I'm good at that, too, I think."

"So, he cooks, and cleans, and fixes things." She gave a telling look to Tohsaka before finally turning her attention back to Shirou. "Or so he thinks. So, in other words, Rin, you do not have a personal chef as he does more than just cook. However, it seems he does all these things, the cooking, the cleaning, the fixing, and so forth, free of charge. Thus, instead of a highly paid and appreciated maid, it seems you have got yourself a perfectly obedient slave-boy."

What erupted from Shirou's mouth next shocked Rin just as much as it shocked him.

"Has anyone ever told you, you're a bit of a brat? Get it through your head, I'm not a damn slave."

"Emiya-kun..."

"Fine. How about just a cook than? I am in need of a good cook. Though, I'm not going to pay you."

"Go to hell."

"Shirou!"

The snap of Rin's words was enough to send a cold wave of shame through Shirou's body at his crude behaviour. It was not so long ago that he had silently and wrongfully chastised Rin's explosive temper when handling the girl. Though it was safe to say that Rin was not the one to have succumb to the sharp and canny tongue of this strange girl, but instead, Shirou. How hypocritical of him. This girl, however, took no notice of Tohsaka's scolding of Shirou's conduct and the petty conversation she was witnessing. She simply dismissed Rin's efforts with a sloth wave of a hand and fixed her gaze on Shirou once more. This time seemed more purposeful than the last. But she didn't seem afflicted by Shirou's spat insult. Interestingly enough, his reaction pulled a devilish smirk from her lips. She liked the bite his words had. Shirou couldn't help but disagree. He wasn't one for being short with another or known for having a cut-throat attitude with others. Even if said others were just as impolite.

There wasn't much that got under the skin of Emiya Shirou. That was a factor of his life Shirou took pride in.

This girl...this utter brat of a girl could get under his skin, however. Shirou didn't know what to do with himself.

"He's fine, Rin. Relax. It's harmless banter at best." She took a sip of tea, noticeably turning her nose up at the taste of it. Shirou took note to remember not to server that particularly flavour of tea for their next tutoring session. Irritated or not with the girl, he had no right to not make her feel welcomed in his home. She was Rin's student after all.

"Isn't that right?" Again, she fixed with him that particular look of hers. The human eye was a wonderfully dangerous device, Shirou thought in that very moment. With very little effort, it can derange you and have you stripped naked before an audience. Though, there were certain things in this world which would be considered far more lethal than a set of wine-dark eyes.

"Shirou?"

Lethal like that of a skilled tongue. It struck him to his core how effortless and cream-soft his name sounded when pressed against her lips. She sent his name off into the world with a kiss. Shirou had become accustomed to a majority of the people he had met while in London completely massacring the proper pronunciation of his name. But this strange, strange girl had spoken it with such ease. Yes, there was a light accent, not an English accent interestingly enough, but the factor of the accent couldn't be helped. It was still immaculately enunciated considering the girl was clearly not of Japanese descent or of any Asian ethnicity. Like her name, her ethnicity and accent bled with the unknown.

"You're right, I guess, Ms..." He tried to pry her name out of her. He was sick of knowing her as just the girl. He wanted her name.

She simply returned his needy curiosity with a smile.

"Are we done for the day, Rin?" She was now back to staring at Tohsaka with bored eyes. Once again was Shirou pushed to the background.

Rin's mood was quick to sour. "Are you going to actually pay attention if we do continue?"

The girl went on about putting on a good show at pretending to truly take Tohsaka's question into consideration. It was an amusing act, Shirou would give her that.

"Nah."

Rin slouched in her chair, defeated.

"Fine. Go. Take note of your homework and leave. We're done for today."

Shirou watched as the girl collected nothing but her phone and left through his front door without another word or whisper to either him or Rin. He, however, still stood by the kitchen table, stiff and lightning struck. The time it took for Rin to gather the mess her student had left in begrudging silence allowed for Shirou's thoughts to murder him in a gentle, quiet art. He stood, still hungry for what he did not know, with the inability to do anything but breathe deeply.

What the fuck did he just experience.

"Lord El-Melloi warned me she would be a handful." Rin finally spat out after spending most of her time muttering violently under her breath. She had neglected the English language in favour of the comfort the tongue of her homeland gave them both. A common occurrence when the two were alone. "But I didn't expect her to be the fucking devil! Dammit, Shirou - get over here and help me clean this up! I've spilt the tea. O, and don't think you're off the hook, either. What the hell was that before? 'harmless banter', my ass."

Shirou was quiet as he went about saving Rin from wet surfaces and crumb-covered textbooks. Tohsaka herself collapsed back into her chair with a disheartened moan. She looked tired, drained even.

"Who was she?" He voiced after some time. He was in the kitchen now, fixing himself a late lunch and Tohsaka another pot of tea, English breakfast this time around, with but a dash of milk.

Rin seemed reluctant to provide him with an answer at first, nipping at her bottom lip as she tossed about different possibilities and outcomes of letting him in on whatever conspiracy El-Melloi had managed to mix her up with. It was all over her face, this bout of nervousness and judicious consideration.

"I don't know much myself", Tohsaka begun. "All I know is that we will be seeing an awful lot of her until further notice. In that time, I am to tutor her in three areas: Modern Magecraft Theory, Mineralogy, and Lore. However, I was also told to reintroduce her to the basics, so add a watered-down version of General Fundamentals to that list."

Shirou scrunched up his nose, confused. Most students, protegees or not, normally only studied under one area of Magecraft. Allowing them to comfortably devote their attention and skills to one department of mysticism the Tower provided. Shirou didn't think it was possible for anyone to fall into more than one department let alone three. He didn't think the Clock Tower allowed such a thing, nor was it physically possible for even the most bright and gifted mage to even accomplish such a feat.

"I didn't know a mage could fall into so many mysticisms. Is she even a student?"

"I don't know. I don't think so."

Shirou handed his friend her tea as he accompanied her at the table.

"Then why pull so many strings to have her educated in so many areas if she is not a proper student of the Tower? That makes no sense."

"I think she is associated with the Clock Tower...just not formally." Rin said, "Lord El-Melloi made it very clear to me that Lucrecia's studies were to be kept classified. If anyone were to ask about her connection to either the Clock Tower or El-Melloi, I am to simply say I am aiding her in taking over the role as Lord El-Melloi's assistant."

Shirou snapped his head towards Tohsaka, rather shocked to hear a word that was neither of the English or Japanese tongue.

"Lu-Lucr-", he stopped, then tried it again. " _Lucrecia_?" The new word fitted awkwardly within his mouth. The syllables were a strange combination for him to conjure and shape as one. "Is that her name?"

Rin, lost in thought and the warmth of her tea, hummed dismissively. "Yes. But I don't think either of us are pronouncing it correctly. I believe it's Brazilian. I think she's Brazilian, too."

Shirou nodded, understanding. Being Brazilian would explain her dark complexion and sharp features. It wasn't much, but it was enough to soothe that unknown heat she had left him with. With that thought, Shirou gave off a rather bashful smile.

That, among the number of events that had occurred that evening concerning her student had Tohsaka peering over the rim of her cup, considering her companion for some time. Her next lot of words were cherry picked few.

"Emiya-kun."

"Yes, Tohsaka?"

She took her time to continue.

"What was all that about? With Lucrecia, I mean. I haven't seen you that easily provoked since our time in the Holy Grail War with..." Rin didn't need to name the certain individual who still to that day plagued, or more appropriately, haunted both their thoughts. The physical reaction from Shirou was effortless to predict.

"It wasn't like that. At least, I don't think so. She – Lucrecia, I mean, just got under my skin. I know it was inappropriate and rude. But I was right. She's a damn brat."

Rin frowned, more at the reality of his words than at Shirou himself. "Yes. She is. But you must get used to it, she's going to be around an awful lot."

Shirou felt something stalk through his body at the thought of having Lucrecia invade even more of his space. He didn't know what to think about such a predicament, nor how to feel. Though, if she was going to make it her one goal to stir an inferno within the pits of Shirou's stomach, he ought to remember to leave the window cracked open just the slightest to keep his newfound temper cool.

Better the cold of autumn than the heat from a house on fire.

**-/-/-**

Rin was right. They did see an awful lot of Lucrecia.

Rin was tutoring her four days spread throughout the week with each session lasting three hours.

More often than not it was Lucrecia greeting Shirou at the door when he came home from either his classes or job. Well, that wasn't entirely true. There wasn't much of a hello or even a thank you, or farewell from her. And not once did she ever wait for him by the door with so much as a smile. Unless she wanted something, of course. Usually, it was just her and Rin at the table. Rin, lecturing on about something important like the differencing factors between sympathetic and contagious magecraft, and Lucrecia besides her; half-dead of boredom and paying no mind to Rin's lesson. This was the usual scene Shirou stumbled upon when entering his apartment. And like the creature of habit that he was, Shirou took to the new routine which was quick to emerge in response to the natural disaster which was Lucrecia.

It should have been simple. Get home, make a range of snacks for the girls to nibble on when they were on their study break, complete some of his own class work if possible, before needing to get a start on preparing dinner and showing Rin's student out the door.

But, as Shirou was quick to learn, nothing involving Lucrecia was ever simple.

The past two months they had known each other a rather odd relationship had matured out of each experience they had shared. The bickering and trading of insults was expected due to their rough introduction, but what followed was among the queer at the best of times. Lucrecia was curious by nature, it seemed. When something of interest had caught her attention, she had the tendency to obsess over knowing everything about the object or topic until she had an intricate awareness of its concept and how to apply it to the world around her. He had experienced such a strange change in attitude the day their radiator broke. Rin, not one for the cold, was quick to snap at Shirou to try his hand at fixing it while she ran to phone the landlord. The radiator, much like their London flat, was an old and severely beaten bastard. Now, as the days grew colder and winter crept closer, the need for a constant running source of heat had pushed the radiator to be used more than not.

With just a touch, Shirou knew what was wrong with the poor old thing. But that didn't stop him from removing the radiator's cover to take a look inside. While he couldn't flush the machine out right at that moment to mend the lack of heat it was producing, that didn't mean he couldn't give it a good clean in the meantime. Lost in his work as usual, Shirou didn't pay much mind to Lucrecia making her way over to him. Shirou had expected her to bother him as a form of entertainment as she had taken to provoking him regularly now. What he didn't expect, however, was the string of questions Lucrecia had for why the home radiator had stopped working and how to fix it.

It took Shirou by surprise at first, this sudden respectful nature and appetite for knowledge. Considering how distasteful her attitude to learning was when in the middle of one of Rin's lectures, Shirou didn't think she would even consider the fundamentals of home appliances and their upkeep.

Nonetheless, he answered each of her questions. And a pleasant feeling grew within him as Lucrecia, lacking all forms of fear or embarrassment in her conjecture, further inquired to the technical linguistics Shirou would offhandedly refer to. Oddly enough, Lucrecia seemed genuinely interested in the mechanics behind their heating system.

In the end, it was clear to Shirou that Lucrecia was a fast learner and only needed a handful of explanations to fully grasp the concept of the device. What wasn't clear to him, however, was why Lucrecia, someone who owned a healthy amount of curiosity – who was easily enchanted by the very notion of developed knowledge, fought so hard to appear disinterested by Rin's tutoring sessions and magecraft in general.

It honestly pissed Shirou off.

Rin worked herself to the bone to make sure Lucrecia was completely prepared for the exams Lord El-Melloi had the girl sit regularly. Not only did Tohsaka have her own classwork and exams to focus on, but her apprenticeship was highly demanding these days and her responsibilities to the Mage Association only grew. Shirou voiced his dislike of the situation more than once to Rin over the past two months. Tohsaka only waved off his worries and, to add further salt to the wound, labelled them as a wildfire of misplaced concerns fuelled by the simmered temper Lucrecia brought out in him.

Apparently, the pay cheques Rin was cashing in by tutoring this devil of a girl was enough for her to turn a blind eye to the situation.

"You know I hate earl grey. Why the fuck are you making it?"

Ah, this further invasion of his space had suddenly developed after the radiator incident a few weeks ago. Any chance Lucrecia got to get away from Rin and stick herself by his side was starting to become a common theme for the two of them. They mostly filled the space of the kitchen. Shirou didn't dare introduce her to any other room of their flat due to Lucrecia's tendency to snoop. Shirou would try his best to not allow her to bate him into heated, often petty arguments, and Lucrecia would sit upon the kitchen counter drinking in all his failed attempts with glee.

She wanted a reaction out of him. Lived for it, even. And as Shirou begun to learn, what Lucrecia wanted; Lucrecia got.

Even after two months of knowing each other, Lucrecia could easily stir something hot and ugly within him. More often than not, Shirou found himself returning her fixed gaze when she wasn't in the mood to bother with him. O, that cool, nonchalant attitude of hers. God, how it was maddening. Most days Lucrecia hung by his side like a silhouette, her eyes solely trained on Shirou as he fussed about his afternoon. She would tease and poke fun at him and Shirou would pretend he didn't notice the way her skirt would ride up as she crossed her legs on the kitchen bench (she liked being in his way). Other days, however, she barely took the time to thank him for a cup of tea. Even if it were her favourite blend of tea, bay leaf and cinnamon, he couldn't get a word out of her.

Thankfully, today she seemed to acknowledge Shirou's existence in favour of criticising his choice of tea.

Ah, yes, the girl was rather a brutal shade of honesty.

But he would come back to that later.

"Watch your mouth," Shirou snapped. “I’m making earl grey for Rin. She's tired and not in the best of moods and you're attitude today isn't helping, Lucrecia."

She shot him an amused look, "better, but still shit. Just stick to 'Lu', thanks."

_Lu..._

For some time now she had been pushing for Shirou to call her by her nickname instead of her given name. Out of spite, and only a little bit out of guilt for how perfectly she had pronounced his name, Shirou refused to address her by anything other than 'Lucrecia' until it sat sweet like cream in his mouth.

It was only the polite thing to do in return.

"I want to say your name." Shirou sulked. "The _correct_ way."

Lucrecia stepped into his space, a rather sinister stretch to her mouth as she cornered him.

"Pro tip?" She offered innocently, yet her gaze dropped to Shirou's lips, considering...Something. "Use your tongue more."

Shirou's breath caught, "right. More tongue."

This was a recent development, too. The casual lewdness shared between the two. Shirou wished it were only Lucrecia who entertained this crass aspect of their relationship. But it usually took two to tango. And the damn girl just got him so hot under the collar at times.

"Are you going to make more tea? not that earl grey shit, though."

"Be good for Tohsaka and I'll see."

She grinned something wicked, "Shirou, you slave driver."

She said his name on purpose, he knew. Still, that bitter-sweet knowledge didn't stop the rush of red warmth to his cheeks. Due to his pathetic poker face, Shirou had to turn away. How cruel; Lucrecia had struck down what little bravado he could muster when around her with just the sound of his name in her mouth.

"Lucrecia..."Their game was over for the day. She had won. Like always. "Go back to Rin and finish up for the night. It's late."

Lucrecia regarded him with an onerous glare. Still her tone stayed touched on something more devilish.

"See. Sounds better with more tongue."

He didn't end up making her another pot of tea.

**-/-/-**

Shirou was rather proud of dinner that night. It wasn't often he derived from their Japanese palate, but he had been craving the unfamiliar for some time now. What better night than this to try out a new dish. Rin had taken to enjoying Italian a lot lately. It was her first choice when they would occasionally dine out for the night, thus, Shirou thought best to match her preference.

It was one of those rare nights Lucrecia had not been over to study, leaving both Shirou and Rin to their own devices. It had been some time since the two had a moment to themselves to enjoy and prepare a rather extravagant dinner. The stuffed zucchinis in the red sauce turned out divine. And the bottle of red wine Tohsaka picked up on her way from meeting with El-Melloi suited it well, too. Overall, it was a pleasant and well-deserved dinner for the two.

Yet, something was off.

“Shirou.”

“Yes, Tohsaka?”

Rin took another sip of her glass, and Shirou could tell by the swell of her cheeks the wine was doing its job.

“I don’t like how _comfortable_ Lu is with you.”

Shirou continued to wash the plates from dinner, willing his body not to pause under the weight of Tohsaka’s tone. It was condemning, accusing. She was fishing for more than just allegations, however. The alcohol had given Rin the extra kick she needed to confront Shirou about whatever suspicions she had spinning lies in her head.

“Really?” Shirou said, rather proud that his voice refused to expose the apprehension which wrecked his insides currently. It came off casual. Careless. “You think Lucrecia is comfortable around me?”

“Very.” Tohsaka bit. “And you’re pretty comfortable around her, too.”

Shirou frowned down at his hands. They were still submerged in dishwater and the stretch of his strong forearms were heavily dotted with soap spud. This insignificant detail caught his attention in a way which Rin’s words could never. He didn’t want them to. It wasn’t a bout of unhealthy paranoia or a fist full of spineless fabrications Rin was coming to him with. It was the truth.

It was chilling how precise her words were.

Despite their exchange of slights and ability to prompt the other into a temperamental fit, Lucrecia and Shirou were, undeniably, comfortable around each other. The incline of their contentment was an artless act, one Shirou didn’t completely comprehend. The birth of this comfortability was truly odd given that they did tend to unearth each other’s foulest qualities. When in Lucrecia’s company, or, more accurate, when seized by her insatiable gaze, Shirou became a whole new breed of reckless. His mouth took shape of a shotgun, and his mind bade wild, turbulent thoughts. Shirou fell victim to Lucrecia’s strange lack of insecurities and ignominy in the worst of ways. It was so eccentric to him, how unpretentiously sure-of-self she was. After three months of knowing her, it was evident to Shirou how Lucrecia’s confidence, even when in a position of vulnerability, stayed loyal to her character and remained one of her most domineering traits. What Shirou originally regarded as heedless arrogance was, in fact, the earnest kind of tenacity one could own. Lucrecia, an individual who did not rely on others to fulfill her purpose and self-contentment due to her overly healthy self-esteem, disregarded the happiness of others if it meant putting her wants to the side for once. This wholly opposed Shirou’s self-sacrificing nature in all aspects.

Lucrecia completely defaced the very core of Emiya Shirou’s most beloved ideal.

And god, did he despised the way it seduced him so.

Especially when she caught glimpses of Shirou becoming mentally undone by her hand. Lucrecia flourished in his torment; dined on his outbursts. It was in those moments, Shirou was completely doused in the ethanol of her attention. And Shirou didn’t know whether it was the heat in her glances, or the warmth of his cheeks that sent him up in flames. It was this anomalous intimacy alone that had Shirou so lax around Lucrecia.

Why Lucrecia seemed so comfortable with Shirou, however? he couldn’t tell you.

“I don’t like it, Shirou.”

“It’s nothing.”

It wasn’t nothing. To Shirou, this relationship he had instinctively constructed with Lucrecia had become unexpectedly profound to him. He held each of their interactions in his memories dearly. Even the times where Lucrecia’s bratty attitude made him want to drive his head through a brick wall. And while tonight for the most part was lovely, Shirou had grown to somewhat resent the days Lucrecia didn’t make an appearance. He often lost his thoughts to a sequence of idle wonderings about Lucrecia and what could have been if she were around. Granted, they were nothing more than over-zealous fantasies, but they did satiate the part of Shirou’s mind that waned like a dying moon when Lucrecia herself couldn’t tend to that fever within him. He no longer felt the need to chase Lucrecia out the door as soon as her lesson with Tohsaka had concluded for the evening, Shirou would dare say that there had been more than a handful of times he wished to see Lucrecia stay long enough to join them for dinner. To see her linger by the door, eyes eclipsed with their usual ambrosial want… Shirou longed for such a thing. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately, this wanting business. It was so striking, so new, that it left him in a state of upheaval. He was never a man who fell to his own selfish desires. It wasn’t in his nature.

Realistically, Lucrecia staying over for longer than needed would have caused a handful of problems. Considering Rin and he still only owned two chairs, the reality of the three of them sharing a dinner was absurd unless Shirou was willing to sit on a milk crate for the whole of dinner. Still, dinner with Lucrecia was often something Shirou caught himself fixating on when he was lost in thought.

This newfound desire, however? It pushed for Shirou to chase after this caprice daydream of his. To the point where Shirou actively, yet subtly, implemented certain situations where this mental deception of his could maybe make reality. It was a little pathetic of him, Shirou would admit.

But than Shirou would recall the last time he happened to clumsily voice his invitation for Lucrecia to stay, if only for just a bit longer… And dear god, did that airy heat within him reawaken.

It was a few days before winter’s eve, and everything around London was bone-aching and white. A gentle veneer of frost set the glass windows of their apartment stiff, and Shirou was grateful that their old radiator was finally replaced with something suiting that of the modern ages. Rin was lost deep within the filth that was her bedroom (no matter the times Shirou had begged her to clean it, she wouldn’t) hunting down a marked mock-assessment for Lucrecia while the girl herself was sat not at all patiently at the table. Lucrecia had that usual jaded look of hers, completely unimpressed with being kept waiting by Tohsaka. Shirou had learnt some time ago how little Lucrecia liked being restrained or forced to do something she had little interest in.

So, it wasn’t all that shocking to Shirou when Lucrecia went to take her leave without bothering to inform Rin. It wouldn’t have been the first time Lucrecia refused to address either Shirou or Rin of her departure. Shirou was just impressed she even made an effort to wait this long.

And maybe she would have left without word or a whisper if Shirou hadn’t spoken up.

He remembered vaguely telling her, in a soft voice as to not spur a rather nasty retort out of her, that Tohsaka wouldn’t be too much longer, and if anything, she was lucky to be out of the cold and in someplace warm. To put it lightly, the cold of London’s winter was intense; most days it poured until the streets flooded, and others the temperature dropped until everything froze over. To his memory, Shirou pin that particular day to be a rather cold one. The wind hinting at something artic and unkind. So yes, it troubled Shirou dearly to watch Lucrecia rush to leave his apartment only to face such a thing.

Especially when considering the type of clothing she chose to strut about in.

The issue of Lucrecia’s clothing choice had been a fixation for Shirou for quite some time now. They were completely inappropriate – not to mention, impractical for the callousness that was London’s late weather. Tohsaka had commented on Lucrecia’s style on a number of occasions when she only had Shirou in her company. Remarking with obvious annoyance that she felt as though the only reason Lucrecia even bothered to attend their tutoring sessions was to flaunt her unique sense of style, treating their lessons as nothing more than a fashion show. Shirou, in the safety of his own mind, thought that Rin was a little jealous of Lucrecia and the way she (like with every other factor in her life) boldly explored her sense of style.

It was clear that Lucrecia took pride in her appearance. Everything she wore was a statement, an aesthetic display of herself and her confidence: to her choice of makeup, to even the way she styled her hair. Everything held a creative and dedicated aura to it. Lucrecia simply enjoyed dressing up and experimenting with her outfits.

And maybe there were some truth behind Rin’s words; maybe Lucrecia took pleasure in showing off her range of styles and aesthetics to people.

But Shirou had to admit, there was an appeal to this type of slight vanity. When Lucrecia walked through his door, it was always a thundering and unanticipated entrance due to her clothing. You didn’t know what the hell the brunette would rock up in. Whether stunning or scandalous, it always possessed that certain charm Lucrecia brought with every look. Like she could pull off anything she slipped on. It was an enticing quality to have. Not to mention, pleasing to the eye.

However, just because Lucrecia had an impeccable sense of style, that didn’t mean the girl had any sense or knowhow to apply that vogue-mentality to the change of weather.

For example, with that particular day, Lucrecia and her clothing occupied the vast corners of Shirou’s mind so vividly. Mostly because he was shocked how she was not freezing her ass off, and only a little bit over how deliciously it hugged her curves.

Not that Shirou was looking, good god, no.

Because Emiya Shirou was not a perverted man or a sexual deviant.

He was _not_.

But maybe he did find his eyes drifting over to the thigh high skirt Lucrecia wore that day. And maybe he was a little impressed to see a set of thin stockings wrapped around her legs. So, the cold did indeed affect her. Lucrecia was just too much of a stubborn individual to let it show up until that point. With but a shy flicker of the eyes, Shirou could tell Lucrecia had gone for a more ‘preppy’ inspired outfit. While rather a plain, simple outfit. It still managed to steal his breath such as all her other looks had. Her turtleneck was a deep maroon, and a thick gold chain with a cross hung her neck. Her skirt, which was mentioned before in the most shameful of manners, was a meek, soft black, and just as her top, it too was dangerously tight.

And that was it. No coat nor jacket nor scarf in sight. All Lucrecia had to protect herself from the harsh cold of tomorrow-winter was the thin layer of clothing she had on her. Shirou almost died thinking of all the way she could catch a cold in such a thing.

Yet, she rejected his offer to stay and wait with a cup of warm tea in hand. She had scoffed and said that she had ‘places to be, and things to do, and even more annoying assholes to deal with’, what that implied? Shirou didn’t know. But it did set off something feral in him. Gone was that once gentle touch in his tone, and soon Shirou regarded her with a voice that welcomed a rather stern growl. He went on to lecture Lucrecia about her unsolicited haste to leave the warmth of their apartment, dressed in what Shirou could only describe as completely irresponsible and negligent of one’s self in weather such as they were experiencing. And what only would worsen when winter finally struck.

In his madness, Shirou went about their clothing rack and snatched one of his thick, windproof coats to shove into Lucrecia’s hands. She took it, with little surprise, but with great amusement. So, she took his moment of lost sanity for entertainment? oh, goodie.

He told her to take the damn thing and wipe that smug look off her face. However, by then, his tone held little to no gunpowder as before. Lucrecia’s slight show of delight was enough to wet the match that was met to set off his detonation. If anything, Shirou addressed her with a sullen slur of half- heard words, too embarrassed with himself to continue. He didn’t mean to come off so passionate about her choice in dress. Well, not to her face, that was.

Shirou, with his face turned away and flared rather rosy, heard the clap of her heeled boots before he saw Lucrecia enter in his line of sight. Ah, yet another poor choice of attire. Heels such as those would make slipping about on the iced-over pavement an effortless feat. God, how his worry grew ceaselessly over this horror of a girl.

Lucrecia truly was the embodiment of Shirou’s worst nightmares.

She approached him in a poised manner. And Shirou thought, for just a sick, wonderful moment, that she was actually going to thank him for such an offer and wrap herself tight and warm in his borrowed coat. Instead, his hope, much like his sanity whenever in Lucrecia’s presence, stumbled with little grace down a mountain side and into a pit of thorns, only to lay there and wait for the sweetest of deaths. Lucrecia had gently pushed the coat back into Shirou’s hold, and with a rather odd smile, one he had never seen her lips split apart to accommodate for, she kindly reminded him how she simply didn’t want to wear his jacket or any other form of overlay as it wouldn’t complement her outfit. She also went on about how repulsive and over-worn his jacket was and how she couldn’t believe he dared to leave the house in such a shabby thing.

And Shirou just stood in place, much like a doll on display by a shop window. With an emotionless expression, and a set of glass eyes, glazed over and detached from the world around them.

Lucrecia couldn’t wear a coat because she was more worried about her appearance than she was about her health…

No, excuse his folly. It was not that Lucrecia couldn’t, it was more so that she didn’t want to.

This girl was completely possessed with desire.

“ _You’re insane_.” He remembered saying, his voice but a faint whisper.

Lucrecia peered through the thick of her lashes at him, a feral brilliancy to her gaze, “ _maybe. But I think you like that about me_.”

And maybe, just maybe, Lucrecia was right. Shirou did like the madness that was bound to appear whenever Lucrecia herself arrived at the scene. It, like her, was addictive. What Shirou didn’t like, however, was watching Lucrecia walk out his front door, taking all sense of madness and addiction and life with her.

Thus indeed, whatever he had with Lucrecia was anything and everything but nothing.

So, if Tohsaka could see that, why couldn’t Lucrecia herself see what she did to him? What became of him at the mere sight – no, mere thought of her?

_Why?_

“Don’t lie to me, Shirou. It’s not nothing.” Rin said, and she took to looking annoyed with him. Ah, yes. He was currently cleaning up after dinner with Rin at the moment, and not consumed by one of his many daydreams. “Are you trying to fuck Lu?”

Shirou felt his face distort. “Don’t be crude, Tohsaka.”

“That’s not a no. She’s not right for you, Shirou.”

Shirou finally shot his eyes away from the kitchen sink to stare down at his friend. Rin sat at their terrible, slightly off-balanced table, with her faced turned from him. She was trying to hide her unease from him, her upset. Shirou felt sick.

Tohsaka was worried about him.

Shirou felt his body move before his mind could properly process what he intended to do. Slowly, as if he were dealing with a wounded animal, he approached Rin until he found himself perched upon their table, peering down at her.

“Rin.” Shirou said, taking hold of one of her hands. “Lucrecia and I are friends.”

“Are you sure?”

“That we’re friends?” Shirou questioned back. “Honestly, I don’t know if we’re even that. I mean, I would like to be friends with Lucrecia. But just friends, that’s it.”

Tohsaka finally sort out for his eyes, a real, serious stare to them, “you sure?”

No. No, he wasn’t.

Shirou smiled, “yeah, I’m sure.”

There had never been a lie more filthy than the one Shirou had just told.

**-/-/-**

Shirou was building a chair before he had to buzz Lucrecia through the entrance of his apartment’s main building and to his doorstep. It was one of his rare days off and Shirou thought it would be best spent doing chores around the flat. Lately, he had been slacking in that department. He and Tohsaka had entered their final exam block for the year before the Christmas break. Therefore, both university students had been wholly consumed by a strict and dedicated study routine which did not leave much room for the upkeep of their flat.

“Oi, what are you doing here?” Shirou inquired at the door with a screwdriver in hand. From what the ginger could remember, Rin had cancelled most, if not all, of Lucrecia’s tutoring sessions for the coming two weeks in favour of her focusing on her own education. Shirou did recall a heated conversation between the two (the source of said heat emanating solely from Tohsaka) a few days prior to this impulsive arrival. Tohsaka made it very clear that Lucrecia was to not come about and bother or distract Rin from her studies; whatever needed Rin’s attention surrounding Lucrecia’s schooling could wait until after her finals. Thus, Lucrecia’s sudden appearing act had dawned a rather puzzling anomaly within the most seeking, helpless part of Shirou’s mind. Was she here for me? A perfidious voice rumoured within the tender and hollowed corpse of Shirou’s glass heart. If Rin had warned her off coming around to the apartment in need of her time, was it possible that Lucrecia had deliberately disobeyed Tohsaka’s cautioning to spend time with Shirou?

Lucrecia was careless as she breezed in the apartment, paying neither Shirou nor his question any mind. Her attention was entirely taken with the glow of her phone’s screen. In the crook of her other arm, however, Lucrecia secured a rather sizeable book. It was not one Shirou had seen on her person before, and while this in itself was new, the book was completely archaic in appearance. Without much thought, Shirou took to undressing Lucrecia of her thick coat and pulled a chair out for her.

With the weight and feel of her coat in his hand, Shirou felt his bones flood with hedonism. So, London’s hell-frost had finally bested his dear Lucrecia and her fashionable stubbornness. Despite all odds, the little brunette had taken heed to Shirou’s words and warnings.

It felt almost cheap to find such pleasure in a victory as trivial as Lucrecia’s choice in dress.

Key word: almost.

Though, however triumphant or not Shirou was in any situation, Lucrecia forever continued to carry herself with grace, unparalleled. The coat, while only curtaining down to her rear, hung off Lucrecia’s shoulders with a certain ambiance of casualty that only some in Shirou’s opinion, could truly pull off. It was almost as though, the item itself had been completely forgotten when compared to the rest of Lucrecia’s finesse. Then again, when daring to peer down at the coat’s label, Shirou could barely comprehend how someone could be so careless to forget that their shoulders were hung by Chanel. And if one were to spy the rest of Lucrecia’s outfit, it didn’t take much to note the material and fabric of her skirt. The pleated tartan skirt and the coat were a set. Lucrecia’s loose-fitting – and thankfully long sleeved – white turtleneck, however? There was no telling where that came from.

Lucrecia was known for her expensive taste in clothing by now, as she mostly only wore designer brands and barely ever draped herself in the same outfit twice. Even so, that didn’t stop Shirou or Rin from tripping over themselves with shock. And how could they not? the girl was ever so nonchalantly walking around their shabby London apartment in a million dollars half the time.

Nonetheless, Shirou couldn’t help but bitterly wish at least a small sum of this mysterious wealth went to buying Lucrecia a pair of damn pants. The coat was but a small feat considering Lucrecia thought that a tight fitted skirt and a pair of stockings were appropriate for such weather.

But that was another battle for another day; for now, baby steps. It was only the beginning of December. He had a few days still to hound her into something better fitting for the thick of winter.

“Lucrecia, get your head out of your phone and pay attention.” Shirou scolded after some time had dragged on between the brunette’s arrival and his questioning.

 _Pay attention to_ _me_.

“I want tea.”

“…No.”

Lucrecia was not fond of that particular word, but Shirou, for once, refused to bow his head to her. Damn that brat. And damn her want for tea! it would be Shirou who would be seized by a yearning so feral today.

“Why are you being an ass?”

Shirou plucked an eyebrow up at her, “you come in here, without a hello or thank you, demanding tea. When I ask why the hell you are even here today, you ignore me. But I’m the ass.”

“Well, you see…” Lucrecia, with an expression Shirou couldn’t quite name, wrestled with her articulation as her familiar accent dipped in and out. It was odd. To see Lucrecia so confused. But it wasn’t your usual confusion, it was more that she was bewildered with Shirou’s confusion. Like she couldn’t quite comprehend why he was struggling to interpret her behaviour as anything but ill-mannered. “I just don’t want to explain myself to you. I thought that was obvious?”

God, this girl.

Shirou carded his hands through his hair, it had grown to a length almost untameable and he had gotten into the nasty habit of playing with it. He could style it up and out of his line of sight but…no. Hell, no. “ _Fuck_ , Lucrecia. You’re going to drive me crazy one of these days.”

Lucrecia’s eyes seemed to follow the rhythm of his hands, but like all things ruled by desire, they quickly became dissatisfied by the simplicity of the performance. Soon, they grew nomadic, roaming the hard, sharp lines of Shirou’s features until they fell upon a set of eyes. Tragic and rich and gleaming in a sick sort of self-loath, these eyes were but molten rock and golden hells. And for a moment, Lucrecia seemed subdued.

“Perhaps... But from what I’ve heard, tea and madness go together.”

Shirou went about fussing in the kitchen, outwitted, and brimming with a mouth full of grievance.

“Stop referencing Alice in Wonderland, you’re no Alice. You’re not even blonde.”

“God, no. Alice is boring.” Lucrecia said, flicking her coiled, dark locks off her shoulder. “If anything, I’m the Cheshire cat, baby.”

Ignoring Lucrecia and her improper use of pet names – and more notably, what it did to his insides –, Shirou thought for a moment. Lucrecia did have a rather cat-like charm to her. A pair of large eyes, bewitching and dark like the bitten moon, cheekbones high and kissed with a beauty mark on the left side. Even in those ridiculous heels of hers, Lucrecia moved with such sinuous poise. Shirou had walked in on Tohsaka chasing Lucrecia around the house for her not doing her assigned work enough times to know how sprightly Lucrecia was on her feet. O, and that smile of hers. The one that sent a feral, hot flush through Shirou. Criminally feline, it was. Very much ‘the cat that caught the canary’.

But then again, Lucrecia donned a rather brattish, royal brashness to her.

“Oh, really?” Shirou said, a smug sense about him. “And here I was thinking how similar you and the Queen of Hearts are.”

Lucrecia laughed, resting her cheek upon her palm. “No, no. You’re mistaken. If anyone was the Queen of hearts, it’s definitely Rin.”

“Oi.” Shirou warned, but he couldn’t hide his smile from Lucrecia. They both knew this. And if anything, this inability to control himself around her seemed to please Lucrecia greatly.

See? Cat, canary. You get the point.

Shirou came around the table to place a tray in front of Lucrecia. Today, Shirou had chosen to make his preferred flavour of tea, Sencha. It was a type of green tea, and in Shirou’s biased opinion – the best blend of green tea. Not too sweet yet bursting with a natural herbal zest. It wasn’t the first time the two of them had shared a pot of tea together while waiting for Tohsaka to arrive. As the days continued to grow drearier due to the season, Rin’s days grew heavier with responsibility. It was a common occurrence these days for Tohsaka to be a few minutes late for Lucrecia’s tutoring sessions.

During those small, stolen moments, it gave Shirou and Lucrecia the time to bicker and flirt and share tea without the vigilant, disapproving gaze of Tohsaka.

It was a terrible thing to do behind Tohsaka’s back, but Shirou found it harder, and harder to control himself around Lucrecia.

Shirou also found himself fighting the urge to want to keep himself on a short leash around her.

“Okay, Lucrecia.” Shirou said as he poured the two a china cup each of tea. Lucrecia never liked to pour her own tea, oddly. But doing it for her never struck a nerve for him; and Shirou, ever the creator of habits, did it without complaint, and without needing a reminder. “You have your tea, now tell me why you’re here. Tohsaka is as stressed out as it is, I can’t have you here to add to that.”

Lucrecia blew on her tea before answering him, “I know that. Rin made it very clear. But I wanted to give this to her, hopefully it will help with her studies.”

Ah, yes. The book she brought with her.

“May I?” Shirou questioned, hands already in motion to make a grab for the thickly bound text. Lucrecia waved him off, she was too engrossed with her tea to pay him any real mind. She seemed to really like the flavour, peering at the rose and gold china cup in her hand with a doting, nostalgic gaze. Cautiously, Shirou took possession of the book and judged its mass. Unsurprisingly, it had some heaviness to it. The book’s exterior, however, matched what lay within. As Shirou flicked through the pages unsystematically, he marvelled at how ancient the Magecraft scripture was. How Lucrecia came to find herself in the possession of such a relic? That subject, among a number of other things about the brunette escaped Shirou’s grasp. However, Shirou was confident Tohsaka would appreciate the book quite nicely. So, that was all that really mattered at the end of the day.

For now, at least.

“This is awfully nice of you, Lucrecia.” Shirou said, setting the book down. “I’m sure Tohsaka is going to love it.”

The girl hummed, peering at the mess on the floor. Wordlessly, she motioned for another cup of tea.

“I’m building a chair, if you’re curious.”

“I wasn’t. But, okay.”

Shirou smiled oddly at her, “yes you were, you liar.”

“Me? Lie? When have I ever lied to you?” Lucrecia grinned back. And Shirou knew how she adored this type of playfulness. Acting innocent was Lucrecia’s favourite pastime.

Shirou swept a hand through his locks once more, considering her. Truly, he was in need of a haircut. “Fine. I take it back. You’re not a liar. You’re just a brat who takes great joy in provoking me.”

For the second time that evening, Lucrecia had pinned him with a set of eyes, notorious as ever, over the habit. She seemed abnormally caught off guard and even took pause to contemplate a series of thoughts.

"What is it?"

Lucrecia glared something fierce over the rim of her teacup. And for a moment, Shirou was brought back to the first time Lucrecia ever laid eyes on him. That familiar, yet hunt-hungry gaze would forever be his undoing. Shirou could feel it down to the very white of his bones.

"You know, it's a damn shame, really." She began and abruptly settled her cup down on its saucer. "You're rather handsome. Yet, you hide it behind that god-awful mop of hair. You have no sense of style. You're like...one of those great, Greek tragedies condemned by the modern perception; ultimately slaughtered by the period eye. Conceptually, a beautiful piece yet executed poorly when retold. It’s such a waste of potential."

Shirou lost the ability to function after such a speech. On one hand, Lucrecia just insulted him greatly (maybe?). On the other, however...

"You think I'm handsome?" He whispered lamely. And Shirou knew his ears were like that of a candle wick, tipped with something beating, burning – red.

It was Lucrecia's turn to not know how to act, "you don't?" She accused. Almost offended for him. It was cute. She was cute, all defensive and cross armed in his honour. It nearly made Shirou wish he had any honour for her to protect to begin with.

“Eh. No?”

“I really have driven you to madness then.”

Shirou shook off his awkwardness in favour of beaming fondly at Lucrecia. No one spoke a word after that, fancying the pleasant silence that roused after their odd exchange of words. Together, they drank their Sencha tea and pretended not to look at each other. It was an oddly shy, intimate scene for the two to share. And they bathed in such a moment until all colour bled from the heavens and the pot of tea between them grew cold and empty-bellied.

“It’s getting late. I should get a start on dinner.” Shirou said, his voice a touch indulgent as he dared to openly stare at the woman across from him.

“Hmm.” Lucrecia agreed, “I should get going than.”

Shirou felt himself still midway through collecting the used teacups. This was not what he wanted when he thought to address the creeping hunger of the night.

“Lucrecia.” Shirou began, setting the cups back down. Their clipped refute pinched at the shell of the ginger’s ears. “If you want… you can stay for dinner. I wouldn’t mind.”

No, he wouldn’t mind. Quite the opposite, really. God, the evidence laid bare on his Livingroom floor. For her to stay for dinner, Shirou might truly collapse in a sort of dreamy bliss.

The brunette thought over the offer, glaring experimentally at Shirou. Unexpectedly, Lucrecia was up and fussing with the fabric of her skirt.

“Nah.”

Shirou was but a mess of tender, aching raw flesh as he saw Lucrecia to the door. And with her heartless, wordless leave, the man was struck with a savage sense of melancholy and madness. Suddenly, Shirou felt the need to pour himself a drink, something gold in colour and would ignite the walls of his throat going down, and sink into the waiting, cold-hearted arms of his chair. Better the burning kiss of whiskey and his right hand to keep him company tonight, anyways.

Less heartbreak, it seemed.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, some explaining:
> 
> \- Basically a continuation of F/SN UBW's London Ending with a twist  
> \- A new spin of the class loved fuelled question of 'can they fall in love?' to 'should they fall in love?'  
> \- Shirou, mentally and emotionally, is currently in this odd between stage of shifting from UBW's Emiya Shirou, to the UBW's Archer Emiya, so he might seem a little out of character but...well you get the point, he is but he isn't.  
> \- I lowkey just want to break Shirou's heart
> 
> Thank you for reading this Fanfic of mine, I hope you enjoyed and I would love any sort of feedback or audience input to aid either my work, plot, or use of Character/s (Who, I do not own). 
> 
> From,  
> Young brat


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